It all began with a high pitch sound. I was just two hours and twelve minutes into Superatindo game and only five minutes short of winning level Five, when I noticed that the sound I was referring to was my mom’s screaming.
“Venkyyy….put that thing away”.
“It’s not a thing amma, it’s a z-pad, an electronic gadget, a WOY-line tablet manufactured by Banana.inc and please just two minutes more….pleaasssee….”
Mom wasn’t interested in my knowledge sharing. She said that she had been screaming for the past five minutes, but I swear I hadn’t heard a word.
I could see a mover and packer truck parked outside from our kitchen window. As the truck moved I saw a girl wailing away sitting on the front steps.
“Look at that poor girl; she must be our new neighbour” Mom said
“She’ll get over it amma”.
Moms never understand about being left alone for a while. She filled my hands with a box of Idlis.
“Go take them and become friends with her”.
“Noooo…” I begged.
Before I realised mom had pushed me out of the house. I slowly tugged myself to the new neighbour’s house. It was the weirdest first meeting ever.
“Hi, I am Venkatesh Murli Prasad”.
“Bohoooo….Bohooo….I miss Queen”, she sobbed loudly.
“The Queen? You mean Queen Elizabeth?” I asked.
“No stupid! Queen was my cat in London”, she said wiping her runny nose with her shirt sleeves. She looked up at me and her loud sobs changed to a hideous pig like laughter.
She rolled and loathed, laughing.
“I am Lola, I come from Britain, but my sister and brother, think I am from Bratland”, she said once she gathered herself, and there she let out her funny snorts again.
“What’s so funny?” I asked
She held her tummy and snorted…errr….laughed again until tears welled up in her big froggy eyes.
“What’s the reason that you laugh like a mad girl?” I asked again.
She grabbed my hand and pulled me inside her house. We both stood in front of a large mirror in the bedroom. My cheeks flushed after I saw my reflection.
A bird was busy building her nest in my noodley hair. I have had embarrassing moments, but this was the father, as we say “Baap” of them all!
I froze. Lola fell on the floor and rolled all over, laughing in snorts again.
This was the worst that could’ve happened to a good human being like me. When I found some movement in my limbs, I raised my hands to help the chirpie fellow. The more I tugged at my hair, the more it tangled.
“I shall try the reverse effect on effects method. It will transfer the kinetic energy of the bird into stationary energy and then ….”
“Shut up Venkipedia!…You are a talking Wikipedia!”
Lola snapped her fingers, went out of the room and returned with a pair of scissors.
“What are you going to do with those?” I asked, my body shivered.
Before I could stop her, she chopped off a large chunk of my hair. My heart skipped a beat.
“Those locks were precious to my mom, she thought of them as a sign of a real man”, I couldn’t believe it, but I was whining.
“How could you do that?” I asked.
“Like that”, she replied, chopping off another lock of my curled darlings.
The bird flew away and my hair that once carried it’s nest lay on the floor.
“What was I going to tell amma?” and, “What was I going to tell Appa?”
I no longer wanted to be friends with this brat. This was the end of the shortest friendship. I had made up my mind never to speak to her again. I picked up the Idli parcel, she didn’t deserve a single bite of those, and left her house.
But things normally never happen the way you intend them to be!